I'm Back In The Game!

Well, I became a bit more enlightened over the weekend. Somewhat of an 'epiphany' if you will. I came to the realization that I have been doing exactly what I continually suggest that others guard against at any cost. Rather than live my life to the fullest, enjoying every moment as if it could be my last I have been living in a 'cave', living in fear of being hurt again. Even though I know darn well that's no way to live, I find that I am doing exactly that and for far too long.



Somehow I have let the fear of another broken heart stop me from taking chances and experiencing all that life has to offer. Life is so short and none of us are guaranteed to see another sunrise, another 'tomorrow', yet here I am wasting my life away being afraid to feel pain again. Like they say, without the bad how would we know when life is good? This 'fear' has caused me to lose sight of my goals, my dreams, my desires only to live my life in a 'box' where no woman could hurt me again. Now, those of you that have also lived in this 'cave' know as well as I do that it's not exactly 'pain free'. It's down right miserable in there. Matter of fact it just plain sucks and it's full of loneliness and despair, even kinda hard to breathe. When you have your heart broken as often as I have over the past few years, it causes you to not want to take any more chances of that ever happening again. Yet, if you don't take chances, you will never have a heart filled with happiness and joy. So in essence, you will still be miserable.


I have never considered myself a 'quitter' in any sense of the word. In fact, over the last few years I have come to realize that I have tons of willpower. I mean, who'd a thunk it? I have also been known to take things to the extreme, 150% overboard, to the max and beyond. Therefore, "How could this have happened to me, the 'King of Extreme'?" How did this fear of rejection, betrayal and letdown get it's ugly grip on me? I can usually 'mingle' with the best of 'em and I'm rarely intimidated by beautiful women, yet I have found myself so afraid of the pain that I have been almost paralyzed with fear. I'm not exactly sure how it got ahold of me but I can tell you that it did. I recently had my heart broken and believe me, the pain and heartache are still very severe but yet the thought of never finding true love seems to be just as painful and so no more living in a 'cave', that's it for me! I gotta get back in action, living every day as if it could be my last. NO REGRETS!!! Like I always say, "the only regrets you'll ever have are the risks you didn't take." That's my mantra and somehow I have lost track of that.



Sure, I could get my heart broken another hundred times or so but I'll have to take that risk if I ever hope to find my true love, the love of my life, my one and only life partner. Which of course is what most of us want. With all my heart I want a special woman, not 'perfect', just 'perfect for me'. A woman to spend the rest of my life with and if I don't get out there and try, I'll never find her. I know she's not gonna come knockin' on the entrance to my 'cave', that's for sure. Besides, she has such beautiful hands and if she tried knocking on the door to my cave, she just might break a nail and I don't want that to happen. Manicures ain't cheap these days and I'm sure she just had her nails done, that's the kind of woman she is.


Yes, there are those that say just as soon as you stop looking, love will appear. When and where you least expect it. They say that I'm trying 'too hard'. Well, I've tried both ways, searching and not searching. Neither have brought me much luck but both are just about equally as painful. So in essence, what have I got to lose? Sometimes you just have to take big chances if you want big rewards. It's definitely scary, all those 'crazy' women out there ready to step all over my heart but it's the risk I gotta take. So it's back to putting my heart out on the 'chopping block', risking lots of pain for a lifetime of pleasure. Step aside all you goofballs and wannabes, all you guys that pose as 'real' men. Looks like I'm Back In The Game! Wish me luck... I'm probably gonna need it.