Someday May Never Come....Better To Be Happy NOW

Happiness. That oh so elusive thing that we all search for. Endlessly scowering the earth for that fix, a way of transforming our lives into our dreams, come true. It can take months, weeks, years, an entire lifetime and still there are no guarantees we'll ever find it.

Happiness can and does mean something entirely different for each and every one of us. Luckily there are numerous opportunities for us to fulfill our dreams, to find our true happiness.

For some of us it's things. A collection of stuff would make us the happiest people on earth. Perhaps it's a beautiful new Home, a Car, a Boat, a Motorhome, all those endless things that we are conditioned to think, from an early age, that are the keys to happiness.



We've all heard the saying, "He who dies with the most toys, WINS!" Makes sense doesn't it? Well, it does to me anyway. Not that I'm ever gonna have the most toys (or ANY toys for that matter) but the basic premise seems to be legit. Maybe toys ARE the key to happiness? Hmmm.......

Others might believe that a loving family could hold the key to happiness. A spouse that truly loves them, lots of kids to share their life with, perhaps even Grandkids to continue on the chain of happiness. Maybe they grew up in a large family and to them, a large group of loved ones around them constantly would truly be everything to them.

Some might think that having the perfect job or career could hold the key for them. Not only because it could bring in large amounts of money but the title could afford them the prestige that would truly bring them happiness. To live up to, maybe even exceed their own potential would be their greatest reward.



And oh yes, we can't forget to add money to the list of keys to happiness. Matter of fact, perhaps I should have put this at the top of the list. There's a pretty good chance that this would be the number one most requested. I'd have to believe that most everyone thinks that money would be the answer to all of their problems.

After all, aren't the richest people in the world the happiest of anyone? I don't know any of them personally but I'd have to wonder if they truly are. With all of the responsibility, not to mention the high stress level that also goes with the territory, I have to question how truly happy they really are....inside.



I'm just like everyone else, on a quest for happiness. Nothin' wrong with that. For me though, while I used to think that money was what I wanted most in life, MY key to happiness but over the last three or four years I've come to realize that it's something entirely different that's going to truly make me happy. Inside. And after all, isn't inside where it counts the most?

Unfortunately I've come to learn that my key is something so much more difficult to obtain than money. Heck, money is easy when you think about it. Find someone that's making alot of money (hopefully doing something you'd enjoy doing, something you're passionate about) and model yourself after them. Do what they do and don't stop until you're wealthy....or wealthier. Pretty simple, huh?



No, my key is so much more elusive than that. Even more difficult than capping a gushing oil pipe a mile under water. Heck, I only wish it was that easy. That only took a couple months, my search could take an entire life time. And still no guarantee I'll find it after all that. I've come to learn that the key for me is true love.

Yeah, I can hear you already, sayin' good luck with THAT one! See what I mean about gettin' rich or fixin' an oil leak? Those things pale in comparison to finding true, undying, commited, do whatever it takes to make it work, love. Ok, that's enough. Please stop laughing at me.




But if there's one thing about me, it's the fact that I'm too stupid to know when to give up and so I'll continue on my journey because I know inside that the minute I stop trying, as soon as I quit moving forward, that's when the woman of my dreams will surely never be found. For all I know, she could be just around the next corner, searching for ME and if I stop trying, we'll never meet. And that would truly be a shame.

While my pursuit of happiness might seem impossible to achieve, not to mention ridiculous to some, others might be able to relate on some level and it's quite possible this could also be their reason for continuing on each and every day. Their motivation to continue their own pursuit of happiness.


Ahhhhh, yes, the "Pursuit of Happyness". One of the best movies of all time. If you haven't seen it, you should. I won't give it away here but let's just say that if you want (or need) a lesson on the importance of perseverance, what drive and motivation, in the face of impending demise, are all about, then you should watch this movie. I guarantee you will come away with a new perspective on just how hard YOU actually work to achieve your goals. Might be the wake up call you need.


Goals. Aren't they basically the driving factor for all of us? The force that guides us to all that we want to achieve in life? We all tend to set them, yet some of us stay focused on them more than others. Some have a way of keeping a laser type of intensity on them, a burning desire, while others will set one after another and never reach any of them.


And how do we retain our focus, keep our concentration directed towards where it should be in order to meet these goals? That seems to be different for everyone. Just as different as the keys to happiness are for each of us. Unfortunately there isn't a magic pill that we can all take to help us get to where we wanna be. I so wish there was as I'd buy stock in that Company immediately! That would help achieve one of the keys on my list.



All this brings to mind a question of sorts. While we search for our keys, are we supposed to be miserable along the journey? What kinda fun is that? Why not learn to be happy now? Happy with what we have instead of miserable because of what we don't have. Wow, now there's a concept!

Sure, we all need a healthy desire for more to keep us moving forward, motivating us to do more, to be more, to have more but at what cost? To live a life of misery, thinking that someday we'll be happy, once we find our key, THEN we'll be happy?



Who's to say we'll ever find it? And if we don't, what then? We ended up spending our entire life miserable, more miserable than it had to be, that's for sure.

Why is it then that we find it so difficult to even be the slightest bit happy with what we have now, no matter what it is? Sure, it might not be everything we want but I'd have to think that most of us, without much trouble at all, could immediately think of something in our lives we can be happy about.

We all have Pity Parties, "Woe is me" times, but at the end of the day we ALL have something to be happy about, something to be grateful for. I've been goin' through lots of crap these last couple years and sure, I've got tons of stuff to complain about (and regretfully, sometimes I do.={) but even I can come up with things in my life to be happy about.




Once I had a friend say something that really struck a chord with me. She said, "Next time you want to complain about your life, just think about the millions of people around the world that would give anything to have your life."

After I began to recover from the feeling of standing about one inch tall, I couldn't help but agree with her and see her point. Sure, my life was suckin', my world was crumblin' but at that same point there was someone else on the planet that had no food, no water, no shelter and she really helped to put things into perspective for me.

No doubt my life wasn't up to my standards, wasn't what I wanted for ME but there were people that were doing so much worse than I was. So I had to be grateful that I lived in a Country that would afford me the opportunity to basically do anything I wanted to do, to be anything I wanted to be. I had to give in and admit that I actually am lucky.


While I don't have everything I want, I don't think anyone does. Not even Oprah. I mean, how much would it suck to have so much wealth that nothing excites you anymore? You could buy anything on earth, a hundred times over and nothing to stop you. But nothin' even gets you motivated enough to so shopping.


To be honest, that doesn't really sound all that good. I LOVE MONEY but when there's nothing left on earth for you to buy and you have to start looking at buying an actual Planet (Hmmm, will it be Venus or Pluto? Maybe Uranus?) on Craigs List, that's when you know the fun train has just about reached the end of the tracks.

Luckily, most of us don't have that problem. We'll NEVER have that problem. Our problem is that we're just not happy with what we currently have but that can easily be remedied. Not by what we have in our wallet or our Bank account but by what's between our ears.


Sure, we could always be happier and someday we might be but let's make a choice today. All it takes is a slight shift in our thinking. Let's choose to be happy now. Because someday may never come....

If you are struggling with happiness, forgetting to be grateful for what you have, I'd enjoy hearing about it and if you enjoyed this post, I'd appreciate it if you'd share it with your friends.

Excuses Are For Amateurs.... MY Reasons Are Legit!

Excuses, excuses, excuses. No mistake about it, we ALL use 'em. Whether we like to admit it or not, we find ways each and every day to slip 'em in wherever they're needed most....to fit US.

Oh sure, we tend to attempt to disguise them as reasons but deep inside, we know the truth. They're just a BS way of gettin' in, out or around something. Something we did, didn't do, should be doing or shouldn't be, but any way you look at them, they're just an escape of sorts.


Doesn't really fix anything, just postpones things for a while. Hopefully until we can come up with a new excuse that sounds a little more legitimate and fits the situation better. Weird thing is, if we already know this is the case, why do we continue to make up excuses, knowing full well that nobody is really gonna buy 'em, especially us?


I'm sure you've heard the ol' saying, "Excuses are like assholes, everybody's got 'em and they ALL stink!" Sorry to sound so crude but I truly believe that this basically says it all. You ain't buyin' it, I ain't even buyin' it so at that point, why bother to sell it?

Seemingly they make us feel a bit better, a little less like a failure. Somehow thinking of it as more of a reason than an excuse tends to make everything ok. Like it was completely out of our hands, nothin' we could do about it, not OUR fault. Yeah, right.


Don't get me wrong here, every once in a while these excuses or reasons as the case may be are actually legit and hopefully they are believable enough to allow us to slide by but more than likely, they'll just be looked upon as another BS excuse. I guess when you cry wolf so many times, nobody believes you any more and such is the case with excuses.


The worst ones are when you know that the only person that will even hear the excuse.... is YOU, in your head. That's when you begin to hover around that fine line. The line between an excuse and outright just lying to yourself.

Even as you're conjuring up the most creative reason you can think of, the other side of your brain is already sayin' bullshit! Yet, you can still somehow manage to eek it out, to rationalize it, albeit with a sheepish inner grin of sorts, knowing that if you don't even believe it, then who the hell else would.

Is any of this actually helping us to feel better in any way, helping to resolve conflicts? I'd have to think so or wouldn't we just stop this silly inner dialogue altogether? Maybe. Maybe not.


For some reason we still hang on to the mentality that it's gonna work this time. This time it's actually legit, no BS, the real deal. But we know in our hearts that it's not and so the torment begins.

Do we make excuses because it's easy? Easier than facing the truth. Easier than having to follow through on whatever it is we're supposed to be doing. Easier than facing the fact that we blew it, we made a mistake, did something wrong and now we have to face the music? Hmmmm......

Perhaps excuses are ego driven and created in an effort to save our pride? Ego and Pride, the Evil Twins! Either of these can take you down but get 'em both working in tandem and it's Dooms Day for sure. They will cause you do things that you already know you shouldn't but in an effort to save yourself from looking like a fool, they kick in and who knows what's gonna happen from there. Best of luck to you.


It's funny how we think all of our excuses, ooops, reasons are for real but the minute someone else tries to lay one on us we don't even begin to entertain the thought that it could be the truth. And if that's the case, why the hell do we continue to expect others to believe us? Oh yeah, it's because they're all amateurs and I'm a pro. A professional excuse maker, now THAT'S some kinda fancy title.

I mean, with all my experience at making excuses for everything, why I can't do this, can't do that, I'd have to be considered a Pro by now. Correct? Thank you.


My excuses run the full spectrum, they fit pretty much all occasions and can be used in just about any situation you can think of. They're basically universal. They can be used for both good AND evil. In fact, most of them tend to do more harm than good. Yikes!



The more I think about it, most of mine seem to be used in such a way as to save me from failure. No doubt I, like most everyone, have a fear of failure. Not sure if it's more or less present than everyone elses but never the less, it's there and it never lets me forget it's there either.


I'm sure it started from when I was a kid and doing something wrong or not as well as I should have would lead to trouble of some sort. Whether it was a scolding or a spanking, either way failing at anything wasn't gonna turn out to be a pleasant experience.

No doubt looking like a failure in front of my peers also played into it as time went on but I still have to think that it started even earlier than that. Nobody wants to look like a dufus in front of their friends but they're not gonna kick your butt like your Dad will! That's a fear of failure.

I kinda had a built in excuse for quite awhile but I had to let that go about four years ago. That's about the time I quit drinking. I gotta admit, it was nice havin' a default reason for failing. Basically it's not my fault, by default. If (and when) I screwed up on anything, I could always say, "Oh, I was drunk when I did that, that's why I f'd it up" and for the most part, I was drunk (or worse) most every waking moment of every day and so it was pretty damn convenient. Came in handy on lots of occasions.


Unfortunately I had to quit drinking and when I did, I had to say goodbye to my ready made excuse. Which really sucks as now I have to be so much more creative.

Perhaps by no longer drinking, it's also made it much more difficult for me to get these excuses past my on board BS Detector. Ah, no wonder they're not workin' for me anymore. I'm startin' to call myself out on my own BS. That's not good. Isn't that someone elses job?



I guess not. Apparently it's up to me to face my own music and live up to my own standards. Damn it, I was hoping it was gonna be easier than that.

I sure wish they had some kind of an online store, like an "Excuses R Us" type of thing where you could just download some ready made excuses, narrowed down into different categories like "I didn't say that", "I didn't mean that", I didn't do that", "I was drunk when that happened", basically excuses to cover all the different possibilities.


Hmmmm? Maybe I'll start a Membership Site as a way of creating some passive residual income. After all, I'm a Pro at making up excuses, so it should be no problem to look back through my vast BS Library and jot down a few thousand of 'em.

Then I can just submit new ones monthly as a way of adding value to the Site and giving my customers what they really need. This is beginning to sound like a winner already. I mean, who on earth doesn't love (and NEED) excuses and to have them ready for instant download and covering every conceivable circumstance, I can already smell the cash in my Pay Pal account from here!

Who'd a thought that all these years of making up excuses (lying to myself) could turn out to be a money maker? Not me, that's for sure.

Hey, wait a second. What if I go through all the work of setting up the Website, buying a Domain, setting up Hosting, getting an Auto Responder configured, creating new content and everything else that goes into building a business, not counting all the expense involved and then the entire thing tanks? That would totally suck!



Well, as it turns out, I'm kinda too busy anyway, I mean with all I've got goin' on, you know, all the stuff I'm doin', all the things I have scheduled in the near future. Besides, you know how it is, you never know what might come up that could take away even more of my free time and then what would I do? I don't have enough time as it is now, how could I ever hope to run a new website, let alone on auto pilot. So much for that idea, just ain't gonna work.

Phew, that was a close one! Good thing I'm such an Excuse Pro, sure saved me again from an impending failure.

If you can relate to making excuses of your own, real or not, I'd enjoy hearing about it and if you enjoyed this Post, I'd appreciate it if you'd share it with your friends.

From Disaster.... Comes Opportunity

Yes, believe it or not, disaster does create opportunity. Now, you may be saying to yourself, that statement sounds utterly ridiculous and not too long ago I might have been inclined to agree with you.

I mean, really, how on earth can a nightmare come to life turn out to be a gift in disguise? Basically, it's because what we have isn't always what we need, despite our thinking to the contrary.

We've all heard the saying, "Be careful what you wish for, you just might get it." Well I was never a big believer in this theory but as of late, I've come to understand it better and it's quite possible that there may actually be some truth to it.

Take owning a home for example. The American Dream, from our earliest childhood memories, we've all dreamed of a place to call our own. A home we could fix up just the way we like it, perhaps right on the beach or maybe a Golf Course, a Lake, the mountains, wherever your dream destination might be. Oh, it would be sooooo wonderful.


Or so we think anyway. For some reason they forgot to mention the huge mortgage payments, Property Taxes, maintenance, upgrades, etc., etc. Next thing you know, your house becomes your life. Every waking (and sometimes sleeping) minute is spent thinking about everything you have to take care of, whether it be monetarily or otherwise and it doesn't leave you a whole lotta room to enjoy it. I've got news for you, home ownership is a full time job.

What about that exotic new car you've been dreaming of. You know the one, the 2012 PORSCHEMBORGHINERRARI GTLP6565XV SUPER ITALUDERIA. Oh, what a beauty. All the reviews can't stop drooling about what an unbelieveable machine it is. "Best car in the world", "Nothing faster short of an F-18 Hornet", "Turns on a dime and gives you back two nickles in change!" Yeah, THAT ONE!


So you head on down to the PORSCHEMBORGHINERRARI Dealership, lay down your $500K and drive away with your dream machine. Then it hits you, this thing drives like crap! This isn't ANYTHING like the reviews said it was. No doubt, given the opportunity, you would have test driven it before you bought it but they wanted you to fill out all the Purchase paperwork, get pre qualified, basically everything you would have to do to purchase the car, short of a final signature and at that point, you weren't 100% sure you were even gonna buy one.

Too late now, it's yours. You DID buy it, along with all of the maintenance and upkeep which, according to the warranty, MUST be completed by the Dealership. In essence, you're locked in for the next three years to $900 oil changes and $3000 tune~ups. Welcome to the world of Exotic Supercar ownership. Is it everything you thought it would be? Probably not.

Here again, they forgot to mention the fact that you'd really only want to drive this car once or twice a month. Any more than that and you'd either throw your back out from the Suspension or the high cost of maintenance alone would pretty much wipe your wallet out.



Maybe a Motorhome is your thing. You could plunk down about $350K, then try to figure out a place to store it for about $500 a month, not to mention upkeep and maintenance. Heaven forbid you actually wanted to use it, that could cost you another couple grand in fuel. For the weekend! Not exactly a dream come true.


My point to all this is the fact that while lots of things sound great, in reality, owning them might not be such a wonderful thing. Things and stuff require effort which in turn removes alot of the fun factor out of owning them.

Which brings me back to my original thought. I had (and still have) lots of those same dreams, just like everyone else. I wanted a place on a Golf Course from as far back as I can remember. Same with the fancy Exotic foreign car. Way before I even had my Drivers License, I've been a Car Guy. It's in my DNA, no gettin' around it.



So a few years ago, I stretched myself thinner that Stretch Armstrong ever could and I bought my Dream Condo on the golf course. I had a friend that had let me stay in this very Condo thirteen years prior and I had never forgotten it. So to finally buy THAT same Condo after all this time was a huge achievement for me. Matter of fact, it was for sale when I stayed there and I had kept the Sales Flyer all this time. That's the kind of impact it had on me and I told myself that someday I would buy it....and I did.

There I was, my back patio was on the 11th Fairway of The Stadium Course at PGA West in La Quinta and I was livin' the dream. Waking up to that view every day was more than I could have hoped for.


There was only one thing missing. If I'm gonna live here, on Millionaires Row, I need a better car to drive. Not that I was out to impress anyone, I just wanted to fulfill my dream. Nothin' wrong with that, right?

So I sold everything I had that wasn't bolted down and I bought the BMW I had fantasized about since I was a kid. No, I take that back. This BMW was a million times better than anything I could have ever conjured up in my mind.


Just sitting in the car, all of my troubles were immediately forgotten and I was transported to another place and time. Yes, it had an incredible stereo, thirteen speakers pumpin' out perfection but I found that I rarely had it on as the sound from the 10 cylinder engine was so much sweeter than any song that was playin' through the speakers. I came to realize that I loved that car as much, if not more than my Condo.

But reality began to sink in. On paper, I had it all figured out. If I sell this, this and this, put that money into this, that will knock down my payments on this which will allow me to put more into this and so at that point, I'll be able to afford this AND that. Perfect, should be no problem at all.


I was more than willing to sacrifice basically everything I owned just to keep the two things I really wanted. Unfortunately, as we all know, things don't always go according to plan. Yes, I sold everything I had originally planned to but at nowhere near the prices I had planned on.

I'm sure most of you have heard by now, we're pretty much in a recession and all of my cost cutting started right around the same time. Needless to say, I chased the market downhill but as I look back, not nearly as quickly as I needed to. I should have been running my ass off instead of briskly walking. Oh well, live 'n learn.


Long story short, first thing to go was a rental property I had purchased with a buddy of mine. Next in line was my dream Condo. I was never able to knock down the mortgage payments to something feasible so I had to walk away in a Short Sale. The REAL killer was my BMW. I had a (sickening) feeling that once that was gone, along with it would go all of my motivation, my reason to get out of bed in the morning, my reason to go on.



Sure enough, watching that car leave without me behind the wheel hit me harder than I even thought it would. My biggest dream in life, wiped away in a heartbeat. Talk about a feeling of failure, I became the Poster Child for Loser!

Since then, I also lost another piece of land but nothing hurt as bad as losing my German Dream Machine. And while I would have loved to stay in bed for the next couple (10 or 20) years, I really couldn't. Mostly because I had to sell all of my furniture as well so no bed to sleep on. It was probably for the best as most of the furniture wouldn't fit in a Cardboard Condo anyway.



I'm not 100% sure how long it's been since most of this went down, probably about a year or two and while it's by no means over yet, some healing has taken place. I still owe a fortune on a HELOC and in Credit Cards, my FICO Score is now about a -33 and I can't afford a battery operated toothbrush. Besides that, things are looking good.

Even though I say that sort of sarcastically (ok, REALLY sarcastically), when it comes right down to it, now that I've lost everything on earth, strange as it may seem, I've also gained something at the same time.

I can hear you right now, laughing, saying what on earth could he have gained? The guy's a homeless, penniless, Bum that's in debt up to his eyeballs, no way could he have gained anything. (BTW, I take offense to the part about being a Bum)

Well, you'd be wrong. After losing my hopes, dreams and pretty much every material thing I owned (and some I didn't own), I actually gained something that (luckily) can't be bought. If it was something that you had to buy, I couldn't afford it. It's something that most all of us take for granted, at least until we lose it. Freedom. I gained back some freedom.


We tend to lose some freedom as we take on more responsibility, that's the trade off. And a sacrifice that one must be willing to take if you're gonna participate in life.

No big deal, you'd think, as the stuff you're gonna buy gives you some freedom as well. Freedom to come and go and to BE whatever it is you want to be. Freedom to live your life the way you want to.

But responsibility can be a hell of a burden. It doesn't seem to be highlighted in a Purchase Agreement when you buy a home or on the Window Sticker when you buy a vehicle but no doubt it's there, hovering over you like a vulture awaiting its next meal.

Do I have any regrets from some of my past decisions? You better believe it. Do I feel like a failure? Damn right I do. If I could go back and do it over again, would I make the same decisions? HELL NO! What do you think I am, an idiot?


But at the point in my life when this all started, I had to make some serious decisions. I owned a house, free and clear and I could have just sat in the driveway, staring at the beautiful view and gotten drunk every day for the rest of my life (as short as that might have been). That was option one and since I had quit drinking just about a year or so before, I really wasn't likin' that option too much.

Option two was to totally change my life, chase my dreams, live a life that I had always wanted to. I had lived a life of misery for so long that I HAD to make a change. So I sacrificed everything to make my dreams come true and for a short while, I WAS living my dream. Then reality (with an assist from the tanking of the Real Estate market) stepped in and kicked my ass. It was(is) a beat down I won't soon forget. How can I, the Collection Agencies won't let me!


Luckily for me time marches on and with that I'm beginning to look at things from the other side. Sure, I have nothing left but on the other hand, I have nothing left. Nothing left to get in my way, to keep me from rebuilding my life, the way I want to. Ok, so it will be a few years before I can make payments on an electric toaster but heck, as far as I'm concerned, toast is overrated anyway.

Who would have ever thought that all the disasters of these last couple years would have opened up any new opportunities? Not me, that's for sure. I've been so busy wallowing in all my misery, throwing one continuous Pity Party for myself that I couldn't hold my head up long enough to see anything in my future besides a life of couch surfin' and microwave burritos, at least until I could find a decent place to homestead my new Cardboard Condo.


With a drastic change in my mindset and a severe attitude adjustment, I'm beginning to feel that rather than letting this be the end to my Dream Life, I'd much rather redirect my focus towards fulfilling another life long dream or two.


And who knows, maybe this new life of mine might even be a little less stressful than before. Hey, I can dream, can't I? After all, everything in life comes from a dream. One thing's for sure, it's gonna be different and with that comes more opportunities that I'm not even aware of....yet.

And so maybe losing everything has some kind of a silver lining to it, perhaps it wasn't all for nothing. Maybe it was to learn a lesson on what NOT to do with your life. I've always been a risk taker, that won't change. I firmly believe that without taking risks, there's no rewards. But in the future, I'll make sure my Ego and my Pride aren't drivin' the train!

From Disaster.... Comes Opportunity. Can you believe I just said that? I can....now.




If you have any similar experiences in this type of a situation, I'd enjoy hearing about them and how you went on to conquer them. And if you enjoyed this post, please feel free to share it with your friends.

The Fine Line Between Prayer and Reality

Although this is a bit off the beaten path for my blogging, I have to admit that this is a topic that has struck a nerve with me and therefore, at the risk of offending, even losing a few of my beloved readers, I feel strongly enough about it that I'm going to voice my opinion. Take it or leave it, for better or worse and all that good stuff.

Politics and Religion, two topics that I know better than to even mess with. As they say, "Don't EVEN go there!" But, despite my better judgement, I'm goin' there.


A situation has come up recently regarding some unneighborly neighbors and their terrorizing of the neighborhood and the decent citizens that live within this neighborhood. Long story short, it's a household containing one worthless, grouchy ol' (in his 70s?) drunk, one 1960's psycho ex Flower Power hippie reject artist (his wife) and four sons of various degrees of drug/alcohol rehab and incarciration. Not exactly the typical Leave It To Beaver household.


No doubt many of you can relate to this group of misfits. Lots of these Walton families exist in every community throughout our wonderful nation. And each stands out more to their victims living close by than to those who never actually get to experience the pleasure of coming in contact with them.

Dealing first hand with this group of losers is always a gamble. You never know if the soft and friendly approach is best or not. While this will work in most everyday interactions with people that have an ounce of decency and any sort of semblance of respect for their neighbors, for others it may not. These are people that all want to live in harmony with their surroundings and the people that make up their neighborhood.

Then there are the others, the worthless idiots that couldn't care less about how what they do effects anyone or anything else around them. Yeah, real winners. I should say losers. That seems to be more appropriate. People that have nothing better to do than to make everyone elses life miserable. If they're gonna be miserable, might as well take everybody else down with 'em.

I hate to judge people based on what others have said about them. Not knowing the history of the previous encounters that lead them to their perceptions, I never like to pass judgement on someone based on another persons interactions. Like they say, there are two sides to every story.


While I must admit, the laundry list of evidence against this family has been longer than the list of incriminating evidence against O.J. but if you recall, he was found not guilty. And so I had to approach the situation with an open mind. I mean c'mon, can a family really be THIS bad? Apparently so.

Now while I myself had never had a previous run-in of any sort with these people, I guess that's mainly because I just wasn't around the situation enough to ever have to deal with it or them. I've been lucky enough to have a friend let me stay in his Cabin near the lake in exchange for some home and yard maintenance and so far, I've been up here about five weeks. Sweet deal to say the least. No doubt I'll end up with a blog post or two about my summer at the Lake.


As far as my opinion of the Hatfields (or is it the McCoys?) is concerned, everything changed for me yesterday and now I'm a convert, a true believer in what the others have said about him and his family. I found out for myself that this guy, the Leader of the pack, is a complete piece of shit!

Yep, them's strong words I know but in this case, not nearly strong enough. Every time I see him walk by with his Pit Bulls (nothing against Pit Bulls, I think they can be great dogs in the care of responsible pet owners, which these people clearly aren't. They continually let their dogs roam unleashed throughout the neighborhood, free to terrorize and poop wherever they please) I expect to hear a couple of banjos start to play (think Deliverance) and I immediately begin to hear Ned Beatty scream somewhere off in the distance.


This guy is the epitomy of one of those guys that lives wayyyyy back in the swamp, livin' off the land, zero education, a product of incest. Yikes, now I'm even scaring myself!

Supposedly he used to work for the Studios in Hollywood and his wife was an artist but right about now, I'm having a hard time believing any of that. I'm choosing to go with the 'Swamp Thing' scenario and as far as I'm concerned, he's havin' (or had) sexual relations with his sister.

My friends (the owners of the Cabin) and a few other friends from around the neighborhood were relaxing on the front porch the night of July 4th, telling stories and just generally BS'n' about all the fun we had enjoying the fireworks display that had just taken place. Watching all of the colors reflecting off the water, what seemed like a thousand boats floating out in the middle of this sea of colors, truly an amazing spectacle (more in another post).

Ok, I know sitting on the front porch, talkin' BS sounds a bit Hillbilly~ish as well but up here, the stars are so close you can almost reach up and touch 'em. It's so wonderful just to sit outside and star gaze. That is, of course, unless an idiot neighbor has his flood lights on. And so the real story begins.


Doing our best to enjoy the evening, we were relentlessly confronted by this glaring light and with the houses all built on different levels, this one particular light is right at eye level. No shroud around it, just a light that looks like it was bolted way up in a tree to shine down on his parking area. No problem or so you'd think.

Well, when you have an unshrouded light that casts shadows 300 yards away, THAT'S a problem! At least for everyone within 300 yards of it! There's a reason that they don't have overhead street lights up here, same as in the desert. It's to preserve the night sky. That's why people leave the city in an effort to see an eclipse or even just to enjoy the stars. When you live in a world full of light pollution, all you can see is the next McDonalds sign down the street.

And so my buddy, that owns this Cabin, went down to his house to talk to him about the light and a miracle occured, the light went out. Oh, how we all cheered. Suddenly you weren't in the City, you were back up in the mountains, at the lake, enjoying the night sky.


Well, that lasted about a day and then the light was back on. He even leaves it on during the day. Why, who knows. Maybe that's how they roll in the swamp. Come to think about it, maybe that's why he leaves it on all the time, they don't actually have electricity in the swamp and he's still enthralled by the magic of it all.

So yesterday morning, as he was roamin' the dogs without a leash I asked him if we could come to some sort of a compromise that would benefit him and all his neighbors (that he's buggin' the shit out of). I told him I'd even buy the shroud for it or a whole new light if I had to. Anything to try and stop the paint from peeling off the front of everybodys cabins from his glaring onslaught.


He was more than fine with it, even going so far as to tell me that he had a ladder I could use if I needed to get access that far up in the tree. I told him no problem, I'm glad to do what I can to save the summer nights. I knew I'd be heading back down the hill in the next few days and I'd stop by Home Dump and pick one up. Right on, problem solved. Or so I thought anyway.

I went over there to check it out last evening to see how I was gonna tackle it. Would I need a shroud or an entirely new light? Let's take a look. After a couple minutes, I decided might as well get a whole new light rather than try to half ass something on there. That way everybody's happy.


As I stroll back across the street, here comes this drunk ass lunatic, waving his flashlight at me, yelling at the top of his lungs, "HEY YOU, HEY YOU!" he knows my name but must have forgotten it in his drunken rage. Then the cussing starts. "'F' YOU, 'F' THEM (as he points his flashlight at all the neighbors houses), 'F' ALL YOU PEOPLE, I'M NOT CHANGING THAT LIGHT! 'F' YOU!!!"

So I reminded him that I said I was gonna take care of it. He wouldn't have to dig a coffee can out of the ground in his backyard for any coins. The light would just magically appear and everybody would be happy. He wasn't havin' none of that. He just kept on ranting and raving, screaming at the top of his lungs.

At first I thought he was joking, since he was totally on board with it six hours earlier but once I realized just how plastered he was, screaming at the top of his lungs at 10 o'clock at night, it began to dawn on me that this guy is just out of his mind.


He's a mentally challenged (pickled brain) worthless old man and the best thing to do would be to bite my tongue. I did my best to contain my laughter but based on what a fool he was making of himself, I admit to letting out a couple chuckles. Hey, I tried.

You could tell he wanted to hit me but without his Pit Bull or his psychotic sons to back him up, he didn't dare take a chance. I just stood there and let him go off. Like they say, you can't argue with an idiot and so I let him go on until he ran out of hot air, agreeing with everything he said.

As he stumbled out of the yard and down the street, I just kept hoping he'd fall flat on his face on the asphalt but damn it, no such luck. I'm a firm believer in Karma so I know he'll get his sooner or later, I just hope it's sooner than later. In fact, I can hardly wait!

As I contemplated the evenings festivities, one question continually popped into my head. What made him change his mind, from one second being all for it and the next, totally against it? Then it finally dawned on me. Earlier that afternoon, while he was roamin' his dogs, he saw that my neighbor, who despises him, was on the front steps and her and I were talking.


Both her and her husband are the nicest people on earth, big time church goers and they love everybody. Everybody except him and his family. Apparently the Hatfield and McCoy Family Feud has been going on for quite some time between them and it doesn't appear it's gonna end anytime soon.

As he walked by, she mentioned that one of his dogs had chased a friend of hers and boy, was he shocked to hear that (Yeah, right). He mumbled something about how "He's never seen the dog do THAT before" and continued on his way.

I think it was at that point that his sick paranoid mind began to take over and he realized that it was all a conspiracy against him. Oooohhh, what could we have been planning? First, it's the obnoxious overhead light, then it's the obnoxious dogs, then what, the obnoxious color of his truck? OMG, when will it all stop?


As the one remaining bent, rusty and squeaky wheel continued to spin at a snails pace inside his brain, he obviously went into panic mode. All these people, they're all against me, they all hate me and I can't understand why!!! So he did the only thing he knew how to do, GET HAMMERED!

He lives in a constant state of fear, fear that he's created all by himself. That's the reason behind the overhead light. He's afraid that someone's going to break into his truck and try to steal something or better yet, steal the entire truck. And if he has a light on, he'll be able to stop 'em.

Too bad the jackass doesn't realize that the only people that are going to do that are his own kids and they'll just take his keys while he's passed out on the couch, if they need to make a late night drug run. The light only makes it easier for them to see what's in the baggie they just brought home.


To give you an example of just how sweet his kids are, the only semi coherent one (brain fried by drugs & alcohol) came by a few weeks ago to say he hoped that his brothers hadn't been breaking in to all the houses close by, including this one, only the ones farther away (perhaps that's why I haven't seen the other three lately, they're in jail) and this is coming from a guy that went to jail himself for threatening to kill his parents (too bad he didn't follow through, like everything else in his life).

He's so paranoid of the exact nightmare that he himself has created. He's brought that Los Angeles Theft / Drug Ring mentality up to the mountains with him, which in actuality is pretty accurate since his family perpetuates it.


All this brings up the question, how do you deal with a psycho neighbor from hell? Hmmmm, good question. A friend brought up the fact that he's a miserable person (got that) and he's taking his misery out on those that surround him. Therefore, we should pray that he gets better.

That's all fine and dandy but prayers seem to take an awful long time to come to fruition and so what do we do in the mean time, in the REAL world? How do we deal with someone that is a constant threat to everyone he comes in contact with? Forcing everyone to live in fear of retaliation from him and his sons, never knowing if your home, your car, even yourself will be damaged at the hands of these lunatics.


Calling the Sheriff obviously won't do any good. They are on everybodys speed dial and they're here so often that they might as well set up a Sub Station. Hey, come to think of it, there's already a light set up so they can conduct their night operations without any problems.

So what are we left with? Do we really have any alternatives other than to just continue to live our lives in fear of retaliation? I guess we can start off by praying, hoping that someday he'll see the light, realize what a nightmare he's creating for so many others around him and all of a sudden become a courteous and conscienceous neighbor. Yeah, I agree, doesn't sound too likely but I guess there's always hope.


Or we could go with Plan B, which is to wait until he steps one foot on the property and then at that point the only decision will be whether or not he gets a single or a double barrel dose of reality. The choice is his to make.

If you can relate to havin' some crappy neighbors, I always appreciate your feedback whether it's positive or negative and if you enjoyed this post, please feel free to share it with your friends, whether on Facebook or Twitter, anywhere you hang out.